Choosing daycare is one of the most stressful decisions you’ll make as a parent. You’re handing your child to someone else for 8 to 10 hours a day, and the difference between a great daycare and a mediocre one affects their development, safety, and happiness in ways that compound over years. These daycare questions to ask aren’t just nice conversation starters. They’re the filter that separates facilities where your child will thrive from ones where they’ll merely survive.
I’ve talked to parents who toured a beautiful facility, signed the contract, and then slowly realized the smiling director’s answers during the tour didn’t match the daily reality. These 17 questions are designed to get past the polished tour pitch and reveal what actually happens when the parents leave.
Before You Tour Any Daycare
Do this homework first. It makes every facility visit sharper and faster.
- Check licensing status online. Every state has a childcare licensing database. Search the facility before you visit. Look for any violations, complaints, or probationary status. A clean record doesn’t guarantee quality, but a dirty record is a clear signal.
- Know your state’s required staff-to-child ratios. These vary by age group. For infants, the standard is often 1:3 or 1:4. For toddlers, 1:4 to 1:6. For preschoolers, 1:8 to 1:10. If a facility is just meeting the legal minimum, that’s the bare floor, not a selling point.
- Define your schedule needs precisely. What hours do you need? Do you need early drop-off or late pickup? What about holidays and summer breaks? Flexibility varies wildly between daycares, and mismatches cause constant stress.
- Set your budget. Daycare costs $800 to $2,500+ per month depending on your area, age of your child, and type of facility. Know your ceiling before you fall in love with a place you can’t afford.
- Ask your pediatrician, neighbors, and local parent groups for recommendations. Personal referrals from parents whose children attended the facility carry far more weight than Google reviews. Ask specifically: “Would you choose this daycare again?”
Staff Qualifications and Ratios
1. What is your staff-to-child ratio, and how do you maintain it during breaks, absences, and transitions?
The ratio during the tour is the best-case scenario. What matters is the ratio at 7:15 AM when half the staff hasn’t arrived yet, at 11:30 AM during lunch transitions, and at 4:45 PM when staff are leaving for the day. Ask directly: what happens when a teacher calls in sick? Is there a float teacher on staff, or do they combine classrooms? Combining classrooms to cover absences means your child’s ratio doubles, sometimes exceeding legal limits until a substitute arrives.
2. What credentials and training do your lead teachers have?
A lead teacher with a CDA (Child Development Associate) credential or a degree in early childhood education isn’t just a line on a resume. It means they understand child development stages, can create age-appropriate learning experiences, and are more likely to handle behavioral challenges constructively rather than reactively. Ask about ongoing training requirements too. Good facilities mandate 15 to 30+ hours of continuing education per year.
3. How long have your current teachers been here, and what’s your turnover rate?
High staff turnover is one of the biggest red flags in childcare. Children form attachments to their caregivers, and constant turnover disrupts those bonds. If a facility has had three lead teachers in 12 months for the same classroom, something is wrong, whether it’s low pay, poor management, or working conditions. Ask the director directly, and if possible, ask a teacher how long they’ve been there when the director isn’t within earshot.
4. Are all staff members background-checked, and how often are checks updated?
This should be an easy yes. All states require initial background checks for childcare workers, but re-checks vary. Some states only require checks at hiring. Better facilities re-run checks annually. Ask whether the background check covers criminal history, sex offender registries, and child abuse registries. Also ask whether volunteers, substitutes, and maintenance personnel are checked.
Daily Operations and Curriculum
5. What does a typical day look like for my child’s age group?
You want to hear a structured schedule that balances active play, quiet time, structured learning, outdoor time, meals, and rest. A daily schedule should include at minimum 60 minutes of outdoor play and limited or no screen time for children under 2. Be wary of facilities that can’t describe their daily routine in detail. “We just let the kids play and have fun” might sound relaxed, but it often means there’s no plan, no intention, and no developmental support behind what they’re doing.
6. What curriculum do you follow, and how is it age-appropriate?
Good daycares use recognized curricula like Creative Curriculum, HighScope, Montessori, or Reggio Emilia. Ask how the curriculum is implemented, not just which one they name-drop. A curriculum poster on the wall means nothing if the teachers aren’t trained on it. Ask for examples of recent classroom activities and how they connect to developmental goals for your child’s age group.
7. How much outdoor time and physical activity do children get daily?
The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends that children get at least 60 minutes of outdoor play daily. Ask what happens when weather is bad. Is there an indoor gross motor area? Are outdoor spaces safe, enclosed, and age-appropriate? Inspect the playground during your tour. Look for age-appropriate equipment, shade, secure fencing, and a soft surface under climbing structures (rubber mulch, poured rubber, or similar).
Discipline and Communication
8. How do you handle behavioral issues and discipline?
This question reveals the facility’s philosophy better than anything else. You want to hear about positive reinforcement, redirection, natural consequences, and calm communication. You do not want to hear about time-outs for toddlers (developmentally inappropriate), yelling, isolation, or any form of physical discipline. Ask for specific examples: “A 3-year-old hits another child. Walk me through exactly how a teacher responds.” The specificity of their answer tells you whether they have a real approach or are making it up.
9. How do you communicate with parents during the day?
Daily communication should include: what your child ate, nap times and duration, diaper changes (for infants/toddlers), activities, and any notable behaviors or milestones. Many modern daycares use apps like Brightwheel, HiMama, or Procare to send real-time updates with photos. If communication is limited to a handwritten note at pickup, that’s outdated and leaves too much to chance. Ask how they communicate about concerns or issues. A phone call about a behavior problem beats learning about it third-hand a week later.
10. Do you have cameras, and can parents access the feed?
This is increasingly standard. Many facilities have classroom cameras that parents can view via an app during the day. Some parents find this reassuring; others find it anxiety-inducing (watching your child cry at drop-off from your office is rough). Ask whether cameras cover all classrooms, outdoor areas, and nap rooms. If there are no cameras, ask why. Lack of cameras isn’t automatically a red flag, but the explanation matters.
Health and Safety
11. What is your illness policy?
Every daycare has a policy about when sick children must stay home, and the policies vary more than you’d expect. Get the specifics: what symptoms trigger exclusion (fever threshold, vomiting, diarrhea, rash, pink eye)? How long must a child stay home after symptoms resolve (24 hours is standard for fever)? What happens if your child gets sick during the day? How quickly do they contact you, and where does your child wait until pickup? Also ask about their policy on administering medication. Some facilities won’t give any medication. Others will with written parental authorization and doctor’s instructions.
12. What are your food and allergy policies?
Ask whether meals and snacks are provided or if parents pack lunch. If the daycare provides food, request a sample menu. Check for variety, nutrition balance, and age-appropriateness. If your child has allergies, this question is life-or-death serious. Ask specifically how allergens are handled: separate preparation areas, staff training on allergy response, availability of EpiPens, posted allergy lists in the kitchen and classroom. Then watch during your tour whether allergy information is actually visible.
13. What emergency procedures do you have in place?
Fire drills, severe weather drills, lockdown procedures, and medical emergencies should all have documented protocols. Ask how often drills are practiced (monthly for fire is standard). Ask where they take children during an evacuation and who is the designated first-aid responder. Check whether at least one staff member per classroom is CPR and first-aid certified. Then ask a harder question: “When was the last time you had a real emergency, and what happened?” Their answer (or inability to answer) tells you a lot about preparedness.
Logistics and Costs
14. What are your hours, and what’s your policy for late pickup?
Daycare hours typically run 6:30 or 7:00 AM to 5:30 or 6:00 PM. Late pickup fees are standard and steep: $1 to $5 per minute past closing, and some charge per minute per child. Ask whether there’s any grace period and what happens if you’re late repeatedly. Also ask about holiday closures (most close for 8 to 12 holidays per year) and whether you still pay for those weeks.
15. What is the full cost, including registration fees, supply fees, and any extras?
Monthly tuition is just the starting point. Common additional charges include: registration/enrollment fee ($50 to $500, one-time), annual supply or activity fee ($50 to $300), meals if not included ($100 to $200/month), field trip fees, holiday party contributions, and summer program surcharges. Ask for the total annual cost, not just the monthly tuition. A daycare that costs $1,500/month but charges $500 in annual fees and $200/month for meals is actually $20,400/year, not $18,000.
16. What is the waitlist situation, and how does enrollment work?
Waitlists at popular daycares can run 6 to 18 months, especially for infant spots. Ask how the waitlist is managed: is it first-come-first-served, or do siblings and referrals get priority? Is there a waitlist fee (usually $25 to $200, sometimes refundable, sometimes not)? Also ask about the trial period. Good daycares offer a 2 to 4 week adjustment period where either party can back out if it’s not a good fit.
17. What is your policy on vacation days and absences?
Most daycares charge your full tuition rate whether your child attends or not. That means you’re paying during family vacations, sick days, and holidays. Some facilities offer a small number of “vacation days” (5 to 10 per year) at reduced or no cost. Others charge full price 52 weeks a year. Clarify this before you sign. A week of vacation where you’re still paying $375 in daycare tuition stings.
What to Prepare Before Daycare Tours
Bring these to every facility visit:
- Your child’s schedule (nap times, feeding times, any sensitivities), so you can compare against the facility’s schedule
- A list of any allergies, medical conditions, or special needs, along with current medications
- Your work schedule and commute details, so you can verify the daycare’s hours actually work for your daily reality
- Your monthly budget ceiling for childcare, including all fees
- This checklist, printed or on your phone, so you don’t forget questions while distracted by the adorable toddler art on the walls
- A pen and notebook to jot notes at each facility. By the third tour, details blur together. Written notes save you from mixing up facilities.
- Your phone camera to photograph schedules, menus, policies posted on walls, and outdoor play areas
- A label maker for labeling your child’s bottles, cups, lunch box, and clothing once you enroll. Daycares require everything labeled, and a label maker is faster and more durable than a permanent marker.
Typical Cost Range and Factors
Daycare costs in 2026 vary dramatically by location and age group:
- Home-based daycare: $600 to $1,500/month
- Daycare centers (infant room, 0-12 months): $1,200 to $2,500+/month
- Daycare centers (toddler room, 1-2 years): $1,000 to $2,200/month
- Daycare centers (preschool, 3-5 years): $800 to $1,800/month
- Before/after school care (school-age): $400 to $1,000/month
- Registration/enrollment fees: $50 to $500 (one-time)
- Annual supply fees: $50 to $300
What drives the price up: Infant care (lower ratios mean more staff), metro areas (NYC, SF, Boston, DC are the priciest), accredited facilities (NAEYC accreditation costs money that gets passed to parents), extended hours, and included meals.
What keeps costs down: Home-based daycares, older age groups, suburban and rural locations, part-time schedules, employer childcare subsidies, and state assistance programs (Child Care Assistance Programs in most states).
Red Flags vs. Green Flags
| Red Flag | Green Flag |
|---|---|
| Staff seem stressed, distracted, or disengaged from the children | Staff are down on the floor, actively interacting with children at eye level |
| High staff turnover that the director deflects or refuses to discuss | Low turnover with teachers who’ve been there 3+ years |
| No structured daily schedule or curriculum | Clear daily schedule posted in every classroom with a recognized curriculum |
| Discipline involves yelling, isolation, or shaming | Discipline focuses on redirection, positive reinforcement, and calm communication |
| Outdoor area is small, poorly maintained, or inaccessible | Outdoor area is spacious, age-appropriate, shaded, and well-maintained |
| Director gets defensive when you ask about licensing or violations | Director openly discusses licensing, accreditation, and how they addressed past issues |
| Children are parked in front of screens during your tour | Children are engaged in activities, play, or interaction with teachers |
| No parent communication system beyond a note at pickup | Real-time parent app with daily photos, meals, naps, and activity updates |
Money-Saving Tips
- Look into your employer’s Dependent Care FSA. A Dependent Care Flexible Spending Account lets you set aside up to $5,000 per year in pre-tax dollars for childcare expenses. That’s a tax savings of $1,000 to $2,000 depending on your bracket. Enroll during open enrollment and don’t leave this money on the table.
- Check for state childcare assistance. Most states offer Child Care Assistance Programs (CCAP) for families below certain income thresholds. Eligibility varies, but families earning up to 200 to 300% of the federal poverty level may qualify for subsidized care. Apply early because waitlists are common.
- Ask about sibling discounts. If you have multiple children, many daycares offer 5 to 15% off the second child’s tuition. This saves $50 to $200/month per additional child. Always ask, because some facilities don’t advertise the discount.
- Consider a home-based daycare. Licensed home daycares often cost 20 to 40% less than centers while providing smaller group sizes and more personal attention. Quality varies, so vet them just as thoroughly as centers.
- Negotiate the start date and registration fee. If a spot opens mid-month, ask whether you can pro-rate the first month’s tuition instead of paying full price for half a month. Registration fees are also sometimes negotiable or waivable.
- Use your employer’s childcare benefits. Some companies offer childcare stipends, backup care days, or partnerships with childcare networks. Check your benefits package thoroughly. These benefits are underused because parents don’t know they exist.
- Plan around the age transition. Infant care is the most expensive because of the low staff ratios. If you can time a transition from home care (parental leave, family help) to daycare around age 1, you’ll skip the most expensive rate tier.
Quick Reference Checklist
Bring this to every daycare tour:
- What is the staff-to-child ratio, and how is it maintained during breaks and absences?
- What credentials and training do lead teachers have?
- How long have current teachers been here, and what’s the turnover rate?
- Are all staff background-checked, and how often?
- What does a typical day look like for my child’s age group?
- What curriculum do you follow?
- How much outdoor time and physical activity do children get?
- How do you handle behavioral issues and discipline?
- How do you communicate with parents during the day?
- Do you have cameras, and can parents access the feed?
- What is your illness policy?
- What are your food and allergy policies?
- What emergency procedures do you have in place?
- What are your hours, and what’s the late pickup policy?
- What is the full cost including all fees?
- What is the waitlist situation?
- What’s the policy on vacation days and absences?
Glossary
Staff-to-Child Ratio: The number of children per caregiver in a classroom. Lower ratios mean more individual attention for each child. Typical requirements: 1:3 or 1:4 for infants, 1:4 to 1:6 for toddlers, 1:8 to 1:10 for preschoolers. Better facilities exceed these minimums.
CDA (Child Development Associate): A nationally recognized credential for early childhood educators, administered by the Council for Professional Recognition. Earning a CDA requires 120 hours of formal education and 480 hours of professional experience. It’s the baseline credential that demonstrates a teacher understands child development.
NAEYC Accreditation: Accreditation from the National Association for the Education of Young Children, the gold standard in early childhood program quality. Only about 7% of childcare programs in the US hold NAEYC accreditation. It means the program meets rigorous standards for curriculum, teacher qualifications, health, safety, and family engagement.
Dependent Care FSA: A tax-advantaged savings account offered through many employers that lets you set aside up to $5,000 per year in pre-tax dollars to pay for eligible childcare expenses, including daycare. The tax savings is typically 20 to 35% of the amount contributed, depending on your tax bracket.
Licensing: State-level regulation that sets minimum standards for childcare facilities, covering staff ratios, safety requirements, health practices, and facility conditions. A licensed facility has passed state inspections. An unlicensed facility is either exempt (often home-based care for very small groups) or operating outside the law.
Helpful Tools and Resources
Daycares require every item labeled with your child's name. A label maker creates durable, waterproof labels for bottles, cups, lunch boxes, clothing tags, and supplies.
If your daycare requires packed lunches, an insulated lunch box keeps food fresh and safe until mealtime. Look for one that's easy for small hands to open.
A well-organized diaper bag makes daily drop-offs smoother. Look for one with dedicated compartments for diapers, wipes, a change of clothes, bottles, and snacks.
- ChildCare.gov - Federal resource that connects families with state and local childcare options, quality ratings, and financial assistance programs. Start here to find your state’s licensing database and subsidy information.
- NAEYC Family Resources - Search for NAEYC-accredited programs in your area and access quality checklists. Accreditation doesn’t guarantee perfection, but it filters out the lowest-quality options.
- Care.com - Search for daycare centers and home-based daycares with parent reviews, photos, and pricing information. Useful for building your initial list of facilities to tour.
- Brightwheel - If a daycare uses this app (many do), you’ll get daily reports with photos, meals, naps, and activities. Ask potential daycares whether they use this or a similar parent communication platform.
Frequently Asked Questions
When should I start looking for daycare?
Start researching 6 to 12 months before you need care, especially for infants. Infant spots are the scarcest because of low staff ratios (each infant requires more caregivers). In competitive markets like NYC, DC, or the Bay Area, families put their names on waitlists before the baby is even born. For toddler and preschool spots, 3 to 6 months of lead time is usually sufficient.
How do I know if my child is happy at daycare?
Look for these signs: your child talks positively about their teachers and friends, they’re learning new skills and vocabulary, they eventually settle into drop-off without prolonged distress (some initial adjustment crying is normal for 2 to 4 weeks), and they seem generally content at pickup. Red flags include a child who was previously cheerful becoming withdrawn, behavioral regression (potty-trained child having accidents), physical marks without explanation, or fear reactions when approaching the facility.
Is a daycare center or home-based daycare better?
Neither is universally better. Centers offer more structure, regulated environments, and backup staffing when a teacher is sick. Home-based daycares offer smaller groups, a more home-like environment, and often more flexibility on schedules and sick policies. The quality of both types spans the full spectrum from excellent to terrible. Tour and evaluate each option on its own merits rather than assuming one type is superior.
What if my child won’t stop crying at drop-off?
Some crying at drop-off is completely normal, especially during the first 2 to 4 weeks. It’s called separation anxiety, and it’s a healthy developmental sign that your child is attached to you. What matters is how quickly your child recovers after you leave (ask the teachers). If crying stops within 5 to 10 minutes, your child is fine. If crying continues for extended periods, persists beyond the first month, or is accompanied by other behavioral changes, have a conversation with the lead teacher and your pediatrician.
Should I do a surprise drop-in visit?
Yes, and a good daycare will welcome it. Licensed daycares are generally required to allow parent access at all times during operating hours. A surprise visit at 10:30 AM on a random Tuesday shows you what the daily reality looks like without the preparation that a scheduled tour allows. If a daycare discourages unannounced visits or makes you feel unwelcome for dropping in, consider that a significant red flag.
Next Steps
You’ve got 17 questions that will cut through the polished tour pitch and reveal what daycare life actually looks like for your child. Tour at least three facilities, bring this checklist, and trust your gut. If something feels off during the tour, it probably is.
The right daycare will make you feel welcomed, informed, and confident. The teachers will know the children’s names, the answers to your questions will be specific and honest, and the children already there will look happy and engaged. That combination is what you’re looking for.
For more family and education checklists, check out our Questions to Ask in a Job Interview and browse all our guides in the Family and Education category.